Today is Tuesday, July 5th

I've been up for hours, just lying in bed trying not to think.  Been playing Moonlight, pushing myself to score big... like that would fix everything.  Tracy is lying beside me and Riley is now sleeping soundly after a very upsetting night... Riley just doesn't like those infernal fireworks and they seemed to go on for hours ..so much for a tight lock down in Rio Del Mar.  We watched the 4th of July DC extravaganza on TV and tried to calm Riley down but the local show was spectacular and the noise made Riley crazy...Poor thing...he was exhausted trying to protect us from those loud noises.

Sometimes I wish I could just stay in bed forever.... I have a nice slug station set up... all we need is room service.  The fog has enveloped our world and  our bed is cozy and warm and I don't want to think anymore.  I keep hearing "put one foot in front of the other" and that's exactly what I'll be doing as we go for T's labs after an apt. with Social Security this morning.  T hasn't been checked since Fri after a platelet infusion on Thurs.  He had resumed the Dapsone with the immediate reaction being the rash has spread everywhere so, he's now switched to Mepron.  Let's hope that stops it.  T isn't on any drugs right now other than his Synthroid, Mepron & Neupogen.  He's stopped everything including sleep aids... certainly a lot easier to keep track of... Of course we've got our fingers crossed that his Neupogen refill gets processed very quickly.  We're in limbo waiting for Bruno? to process the paperwork.  I must have asked him 5 times on Fri.... let's see what it takes to get it done...  in the meantime, we'll go to Dr. Wu's office for a shot.  My fight has left the building... I'm tired, emotionally spent... and still we go on...fighting the good fight.  T is worth it.  Later this week, if the weather holds, I'd like to drive T down to the beach.  He needs to see those gorgeous dolphins playing in the surf... I've been very lucky.  Saw them from my open house on Sat. and while walking with Carla on Sun.  They're frolicking in the waves teasing us to celebrate life whatever that shapes up to be....