Today is Sunday, July 3rd

I've had no words for several days.  The world stopped on Fri.  We had a candid conversation with Bruno et al and we have a lot of work to do.  If I were back in my old high tech HR role;  I'd put both these two Doctors and their Nurse Practitioners in a room and let them duke it out and make sure we'd get a resolution that worked.  Instead we have two egos that just don't and won't cooperate.  Bruno says they just don't have the expertise and Wu says they just won't cooperate.  So we're stuck in the middle.  Bruno suggested another doctor to coordinate with but that's an avenue we just don't have the energy for.  While T has a break from chemo we have a much bigger job.  We have to build him back up.  Everyone's in agreement on one thing and that is Tracy has to be strong enough to tolerate the next phase of the protocol.  Today he's not.  Bruno is adamant that there shouldn't be more than a month break because the effectiveness of the treatment is linked to the close integration of each phase.  That means T's counts have to be raised substantially.  That means building up his core by eating, exercise and faith.  We will continue to have T's labs drawn here in Santa Cruz during the break... BUT it looks like T will, if able, continue treatment at Stanford.  I don't think we have a choice.  The next phase consists of IV chemo given on days 1, 3 and 8 etc.  and then, the 4th and 5th weeks consecutive days of IV treatment.  T will need very close monitoring by Stanford and we'll need drivers.  Once we know when he's ready to start,  I'll put a schedule together and ask for help.  We'll need you, our extended family.

We are trying to think positively about the prospects.  Frankly, I'm stunned.  The thought that Tracy wouldn't be strong enough to continue had never really occurred to me.  The alternative is not something I'm willing to entertain.  So, we are slowly moving forward.  My T wants to start living again.  He's tired of being sequestered.  So, we'll build up his white cell count so, that he can be exposed to more people... hopefully.  We need all your love and support so, please keep that white healing light incoming.

Happy 4th of July!!!  Carpe diem!