A couple days since I've written anything... I've been collecting my thoughts and gathering my senses. I realized as we left Dr. Wu's office late this afternoon, that I had taken a big breath and then, a huge sigh... lots of shallow breathing and fear have been my normal lately and today, finally after meeting with Dr. Wu again, I feel like there is life after all. He's so approachable, answering the questions we haven't even asked. He answers every question thoughtfully and directly. I keep asking why T has to continue with more chemo and why his platelet count is so low? Very simply: T's bone marrow is very slow to recover...it's taken a lot longer for him to bounce back and now he's "off the farm".. he's deviated from the protocol so, all bets are off as to how his treatment will continue. Since so much time has elapsed between the last phase & the next phase there's no telling how T will fare. Dr. Wu says the question that needs to be answered is Quality VS Quantity? Does T take it easy & go with a chemo light or sacrifice quality time for hopefully more years? When Dr. Wu mentioned 9 years vs 10 years; I took a big breath. All of a sudden, we got our lives back. We were talking about years, not months or even days. I can't voice how relieved I feel. I've got a spring in my step and hope in my heart.
We meet with Bruno on Friday. T has no recollection of how low he got or how hard he was hit. I guess that's a good thing. He'll have to make the decision about whether he wants to continue with chemo when his body is ready... who knows when that will be... in the meantime, we'll just coast & love living together here on the central coast... together that's the key.