Today is Saturday, June 28th

Hellatious day at the ITA today for our Tracy...  Tracy started out the day by taking a walk across the street to Hoover Park.  Tried the walker.. just not tall enough... but he's determined he needs a cane that doubles as a seat.  Any one heard of that?  He needs a walk aid, a cane that doubles with a seat, that when he's tired, he can collapse on for a couple minutes.... Help?

Wonder why I feel so apprehensive about meds and treatment for our T?   Hmmm...  maybe it's cause when something gets flagged as a problem,  several tests are prescribed and unless I get assertive;  we don't get results.  Tracy had an x-ray on Thurs. & a CT scan on Fri. because he had a spot on his lung. Today, it would have been completely ignored if I hadn't asked... WTF?  I probably alienated everybody today in the ITA because I wasn't settling for the 'no problem'.  You've sufficiently scared me... I want answers.  So, the spot is still there; but they think it may be due to the fact that T has been bed ridden for so long... I don't know... but I am going to start questioning every test and every med that's prescribed.

What I really got today was this is a teaching hospital....  The Dr. came by & finally, after being assertive, I got some answers... then, we were moved to a private room in the ITA and the nurse donned protective gear and took another blood sample and a nose swab without any explanation.  Then, the Nurse Practitioner lost my confidence when she didn't tell why me they were prescribing a new med and didn't know that Walgreen's in the Cancer Center closed in 5 min. at 3:00.  Come on!!! You work here.  Shouldn't you know that?

Then, the topper ( coup de grace?) the Walgreen's pharmacist pulled me aside and asked when Tracy had had his last EKG?  The prescribed antibiotic with the already prescribed Tacrolimus (the immunosuppressant) could cause arrythymia.  So, I stormed upstairs to the ITA and asked to speak to the Nurse Practitioner again.

She was still in the corridor.  I told her that the pharmacist had insisted upon a recent EKG.  She claimed that there was no reason for worry.  This is a $600 med. that as far as I can tell may not be warranted and could be harmful.  There, I've said it.  She asked me to trust her 6 years of experience and continue to trust what she had to say.  I'm not feeling it.  Have I given it to T?  not sure I want to answer that....  am I paranoid?  yes...

This evening, after bathing T, changing & washing the bed linens and watching "Jack Ryan: First Recruit" 5 stars and "Her" not so sure... and Tracy actually consuming a half sandwich of fried bologna & a half banana... Tracy was not well...  oh god...what to do?  I finally decided to let him rest...  gave him a sleep aid...not Ambien and then, I gave up...