Today is Monday, November 29th

Started out like any normal Monday...9:30 AM final walk through for the 1031 exchange which closes tomorrow and I decided to go see T at Dominican Hospital.  ahhh fate...  so, I was in his room when Dr. Deepa arrived and she wanted to check a few things first, but she thought that it would be advisable for T to leave.  He was stabilized, white cell count back up to 4.5 and he was hydrated... staying in the hospital any longer would just expose him to some very sick people so, we said YAY!!!  Let's go!!!  I knew it would take awhile so, I ran an errand and came back only to fatefully find a parking space in the back of the hospital...


Several hours later, the orders were still incomplete... I started checking and we noticed that there were an awful lot of helicopters buzzing the hospital and we kept hearing sirens... finally, a nurse informed us that the hospital was on lock down.  The story we heard was that a jail prisoner had come to the hospital for an MRI and when his shackles were removed for the MRI;  he over powered his female guard, took her gun and tazed her.  Then he escaped.  Of course, the fact that he was 6' 7, over 300 lbs. & dressed in a yellow jumpsuit should have pretty clearly identified him as a fugitive of some kind. .. don't ya think?   So, while this crazy guy went snooping around the neighborhood looking for a place to hide, we were a captive audience.  The sheriffs, cops and CHP were hunting their prey and we were stuck...  now why a lone woman was guarding this giant criminal is a very good question and why she'd unshackle this guy without back up is another good question...


We were finally able to leave the hospital about 4:00 PM because luckily our car was parked in the back of the hospital.  The entire front parking lot was a crime scene but we were finally free!!!  We headed home for some hot turkey open faced sandwiches by way of CVS pharmacy...armed with lomitil...  home at last!!!  What a day!!!

Today is Sunday, November 28th

Today started out with my thinking I had to be the momma bear again to protect the man I love.  Our experience with hospitals hasn't all been as positive as Stanford.  In Oct. of 1999, I learned what it meant to be an advocate for my man lost in the hospital system.  So, I lingered over my coffee and cereal, planning what I thought had to be done for Tracy's experience at Dominican.  I called Stanford and spoke with the Doctor on call.   I learned that there hadn't been any collaboration with Stanford and I was worried.  I wanted to be sure that T was being treated with 'kid gloves' and an eye towards keeping him on track for his continuing treatment.  The poor guy had had non-stop diarrhea for a week now... his tummy hurt and he deserved better.  So, I went to the hospital loaded for bear.  


I arrived and T said that he'd just seen Dr. Deepa and the oncologist.  They were still waiting for the very last results from the stool cultures for CDiff, the most virulent intestinal bug.  They wanted to delay any Immodium or Mylanta or anti-diarrheal until they knew what they were dealing with.  Makes perfect sense upon reflection, but I came in thinking that we'd lost valuable antibiotic treatment time in order to be ready for chemo...already delayed 2 weeks.  


So, I walked into T's room ready to battle the world and instead, my loving hurting husband told me to slow down, relax and listen.  Kind of like when we learned how to scuba dive... first thing we learned was  "Stop, Look, Action"... OK, it was time to use that philosophy and T was right...I was so ready for battle, I neglected to ask T what he thought.  This time around he was conscious and very much a part of the deal and man, I'm thankful for that.  So, the T man said, "Hold it!!!  Look. Listen."  I took a look at his face and realized that he had color and he was calm and he was breathing better and his ankles weren't as swollen... still not as 'dainty or as shapely' as normal, but he was making progress.  I wanted to scream but instead, I sat down and listened.  My honey doesn't have CDiff and I thank God!!!  His pneumonia is on the mend too.  The antibiotics were not helping his poor tummy.  Now hopefully, he'll heal and we'll get on to the next level...  I'm so glad!!!  He was given an anti- diarrheal, Mylanta and a Neupogen shot... full steam ahead!!!!  Thank you all for all your love and support!!!!  We're gonna get thru this!   


I picture a time where we're sitting on a beach in the sun...relaxed, tan & laughing... with Riley by our side....

Today is Saturday, November 27th

AI YI YI!!!  Tracy had a terrible night.  I called Stanford at 8AM and spoke with Dr. Dunn again... I said, "I'm back"... my instructions were to get T to the nearest emergency room asap because he needed fluids quickly.  Scrambled eggs and toast, gathered up my laptop, book for T, crocheting and away we go...


We were at Dominican Hospital by 10:15 and in a room in the ER by 10:30... T's blood pressure was elevated and he was running a temperature.... after history was taken, T was put on an IV for fluids and multiple draws for tests, cat scan, EKG... when I pointed out that T's ankles were severely swollen,  T chided "usually he had such dainty ankles" ... T's white cell count was now .75 (how did that happen????) and the edict was that T would go by ambulance to Stanford.  


This is a nightmare that we can't seem to wake up from.... 


I ran home and returned in 40 min. with T's mask (he was now officially neutrapenic) and a bag with T's hospital needs...(underwear, iPod & speaker, razor, slippers, books, batteries etc.) and in my absence: 180 degree turn around... the doctors had decided that T would be admitted to Dominican.  I became momma bear... T hadn't eaten anything since breakfast... he had acid stomach... mylanta? he was thirsty... you want a stool sample ...give him something to eat or drink... so, apple juice and there you have it...  now his white cell count is .5  WTF???


So, finally I went to the cafeteria to get food for both of us.  The only thing that was available at 4:00PM was the salad bar... wouldn't work for neutrapenic Tracy so, I had tuna fish and went back to T's room.  He'd been given saltines and juice.  I left another message for food and T evicted me... I was crazed and went home to Riley, a hot bath, a weird movie, several glasses of wine and a phone call to T....Tracy was served a full dinner at 5:00 by the head nurse who T described as a very severe nun who proclaimed that it was unacceptable that he'd had to wait so long for food....YAHOO!!!!    ....soon, very soon...sleep... 


All is well and I miss my T man.... sleep tight...

Today is Friday, November 26th

We awoke to a gorgeous clear day on the coast... my leg pains were gone and Tracy had had a night of light sweats with his stomach intact.  We decided to call Stanford, preemptively avoiding being scolded, to inform the doctors that Tracy had had some night sweats and that the antibiotics were tearing up his stomach.  I suggested that we separate the pills, one with breakfast and the other with dinner.  Dr. Dunn, the doctor on call, said she felt comfortable eliminating one of the super drugs and that has boded better for T today.  The blood culture isn't back yet and we feel it's a day of rest.


Off to the chiropractor, the library and Safeway to load up on liquids for T... root beer, ginger ale, 7-up and gatorade. 


I called my Aunt Etta, mom's twin sister who celebrated her 97th birthday yesterday.  She was full of good cheer.  Her voice is exactly like my mom's...they were identical although my mom was more petite... sometimes I imagine it is my mom again... I guess you never get over that yearning to hear their reassurances and that all encompassing feeling of unconditional love...


 Turkey sandwich for lunch and then, time for a nap for all...  Dinner was an open faced hot turkey, stuffing slathered with gravy sandwich, cranberry oozing out all over & T's favorite root beer to complete the perfect picture of serenity... we cuddled by the fireplace, reading while listening to our favorite jazz station until it was time to call it a night.... 


Thank you for a day of peace!!!

Thanksgiving Day, November 25th

Today I am thankful for family, friends, Tracy and Riley....energy, sunshine, rain and the prospects of the future with my honey feeling no pain...

I rolled out of bed with a game plan...21 lbs. of turkey in the oven and cooked so, that we'd eat by 1:30...  oh boy, that means work it!  So, oven set to 350 degrees, coffee maker perking away, juice downed with vitamins, food processor chopping up carrots, onions and celery for the bottom of the turkey pan and then, I just went for it... what the hey...stuffing...no recipe but there it was... waiting... cornbread croutons, celery, carrots, onions, cranberries, an orange, herbs...and butter... washed the turkey after I emptied out all the crevices (one year I actually forgot to take out the bag of giblets) and rubbed butter all over (ok so, I cheated but margarine just didn't seem right)  and left pats of butter under the skin and stuffed that baby.. this turkey wasn't going to be dry on my watch!  In the oven at 7:38 AM breast side up for 2 1/2 hours under foil...basting, basting, basting... as my kitchen started filling with smoke, I realized that this very large turkey was dribbling on the bottom of the oven and it was burning ...I am very thankful for the great exhaust fan we have at times like these...  so, I turned that turkey over and the smoke stopped and the aroma was tantalizing...,mmmm  .. meanwhile,   oatmeal for our breakfast, set the table and started the cranberry orange sauce...  stripped the bed cause T had a couple of night sweats and dressed.... everything was ready and Lila arrived with flowers and her world famous stuffing to go in the oven...wow!  She stayed for a couple minutes and then, Sue & Evelyn (our wonderful Riley loving neighbors who care for him when we can't), and the gorgeous girls, Carla & Hayley all arrived bearing mashed potatoes, salad, green beans & bacon, and homemade cookies, cranberry bread and cupcakes.  What a feast!!!    


I am truly thankful for a day of normalcy... thank you God!!  thank you my friends and thank you my family for all your loving support!!!

Sue, Evelyn, Tracy, Carla & Hayley

Hayley, Carla and me

Catching up again Mon, Tues, Wed. Nov.22-24th

Monday was a blur.. lots of catch up plus cash for keys program worked beautifully for my new listing.  Poor gal hit a bad stretch... her mom had had a spinal cord accident in the Philippines where there isn't any health insurance and bribery is how things get taken care of.  Never realized that we had it sooo good!  T had held his own all day and after we ate dinner; I spent the evening working on getting my 1031 exchange back on track.


Tuesday,  after a largely sleepless night because I was uncomfortable with the deal we'd struck; I doubled down and finally, my client was satisfied and happy.  Hours of paperwork and then, she signed off her documents so, we will close by the 30th.  Unfortunately,  the Corralitos deal wasn't to be.  Sometimes there's just no way... still waiting to hear on Mike & Janet's home... at least it's in the system...that's a good thing!


Tracy was down in the dumps... his ankles were very swollen and he had severe chills before we went to sleep.  We made a list of the things we needed to speak to the doctors about: hand cramps, shivering & trembling, swelling, treatment?  We took an early shower after dinner and got into bed.


Today, Nov. 24th is our 15th anniversary!  A memorable day for us... we'll have time to celebrate when we beat this thing...

We made it to the hospital in under an hour today. but it seemed like we kept taking one step forward and two steps back.  Dr. Michael Koontz took T through the discovery process.  Scolded again.  We should have called when T had the first bout of the chills... it's just that he's done that for years so, neither one of us thought to call.  So, the bad news is that T has pneumonia.  His white cell count is up to 20... not good....He had so many labs done today for all kinds of reasons and he was down.. T's now on two different mega doses of antibiotics which are really tough on the tummy so, they must be taken with food.  8 hours later we left Stanford's Cancer Center... Tracy had been poked, prodded, hydrated and warned that if the blood test came back positive (results in 24-48 hours) he'd have to be re-admitted.  So, finally we made it home by 7 PM.  Kombucha tea, chicken broth with rice and my T was asleep at last.  Lucky for us, Lila offered to make our stuffing for tomorrow cause I'm too tired to tackle it... tomorrow is another day!

Sunday, November 21st

What a storm!!!!  Poor Riley couldn't have snuggled any closer.  rolling thunder and lightning.. amazing that we never lost power!  I learned that my Sunnyvale trip wouldn't be happening and that was a good thing since mid-day brought sheets of rain and hail too...  I kept thinking about canceling my open house but since it was advertised, I went ahead & was totally soaked putting out the signs... and lo and behold, there was a steady stream of visitors & neighbors all afternoon.  The sun even came out as I met my clients to show them a Seacliff craftsman beauty...  


I had been checking on T all afternoon as I checked on the niners score... apparently the niners never showed up...  T was hanging in his slug station.. Gatorade, newspaper, TV remote, non-stop football, wrapped in Mom's handmade crocheted throw and Riley right by his side.  


T was not feeling great when I arrived home so, Kombucha green tea and some chicken broth and rice at least helped a little.  We may call the gastroenterologist in the morning... we'll see how he does.  


More paperwork and at long last sleep for the weary....  tomorrow is truly a new day!