Today is Mother's Day 2012 and I sincerely hope that all you Moms are being feted and celebrated!!!
My Mom passed on May 26th, 1996 and we weren't ready to have her go... Are you ever really ready to lose your Mom?
I'll never forget that morning... We had been to Connecticut the previous weekend to spend good quality time with Mom and to search for a new retirement living home for her. We had finally convinced Mom that it was time to let go of our family home. She had survived a terribly lonely winter deluged by 11 snow storms... shut in by the snow, deprived of company... Mom had visited with us for 6 weeks between Nov. and Dec. ( thank God we planned our wedding around her visit) and then again in the new year but she was a social being and living alone in her Cape Cod home (with too many floors) was taking its toll.
I called Mom every morning and we'd chat about all manner of things. Funny how you become friends with your parents in later years... I adored her spunk and her ability to "just do it"... and a lot of other things about that wonderful loving soul... and so, I'd spoken with Mom early the day before about our plan to go diving in Carmel Bay on the Monterey coast that Sat., May 25th. It was to be my first cold water dive in the Pacific and I was yah, apprehensive to say the least. Wearing a rented wetsuit and jumping off a boat in 10' seas was a little unnerving... Mom teased me about me being a daredevil... but I figured out that day that I'd prefer to be a warm water diver. Anyway, I called Mom early on the 26th par usual. I remember telling her I loved her many times that morning.... I was compelled and didn't know why. Do we ever know why we say or do some things? I repeatedly said "Mom, I love you" as I related the perilous dive trip and the fact that I survived... and my resolve that I probably preferred warm water diving from now on.... We spoke of what Mom was going to do that day... She'd decided that she needed a Sunday paper and some red grapes. I asked her if she was going to go get some Chinese food (her favorite treat) and she said she hadn't decided. I told her that I loved her again and said good bye.
Several hours later, I was sitting at my desk facing Tracy at his desk when the phone rang. So many things went through my head as I picked up the receiver. Shar was calling. We exchanged hellos and then, Shar said "Mom's gone." I said "You're kidding" and she said, "No"... and I began to scream, NOOOOOOOO.... I kept thinking that if I hadn't picked up the phone...
I miss her every day...I had a hard time eating red grapes after that. There are days where I wear her rings or like Fri. when I wore her beautiful flower pin...her jewelry brings her essence to me. I feel her strength when I wear her things... she helped me through the last year... I know she lives on in me and I only hope I do her justice...
Love you Mom and the memories....
About Me
- AnneMarie
- Concerned Citizen and a Serial Entrepreneur wrapped in a progressive democratic soul longing for us all to get along.
Sunday, May 13, 2012
Monday, May 7, 2012
Today is Sunday, May 6th
I am crazy busy and thanking God for it all... but so sorry I'm not keeping up with my blog. I finally realize I'm not superhuman.... so, first Tracy...
Our man has had a tough week and consequently, it's been tough living with him. He's been impossible but he's also been having more pain and headaches...and unfortunately, he ran out of Norontin. CVS was told by Blue Shield that they couldn't renew his prescription until Tues. and T had been out of the meds for a day already (unbeknownst to me). When T emailed Janell @Stanford Fri., it bounced cause she's not back in until Mon. So, yesterday, I took over, paged the on duty hematologist and explained that as the prescription was written, T had exceeded his allotment (altho' the docs had said he could increase as much as needed). Now CVS wasn't getting the message & I'd enlisted Linda's help to pick up T's meds cause I was enroute to an open house in Milpitas & T had been dozing when I left. Linda & then, T ended up wrangling with the pharmacist and getting it filled & covered by insurance. I have to say I was instantly ballistic cause no insurance co. should be able to dictate what meds a patient needs or when!!! Luckily, Linda & T prevailed and I vented and no animals were injured in the process. So, T was not feeling well when he finally got the meds and ended up having a very hard time 'til his body evened out..
Today T seems more like himself. Thank God!!! We were able to meet Deanna & Gary's new grandbaby and hang out in Saratoga with our extended family while I fielded 25 offers for my new Milpitas listing. Funny, I thought we only had 15 and then, after finally checking all my email accounts - there were another 8. We countered 4 and made my wonderful clients very happy! I was able to meet them in our Los Gatos office to review the offers. Background on why I took a Milpitas listing: I sold these referred clients a small home on a 9300 sq' lot in the Cambrian area of San Jose almost 3 years ago. Their intention was to remodel the new home and move in within 6 months. Well, as we all know remodels never complete on time or on budget so, they moved into their new home about a week ago. I put their Milpitas home on the MLS Thurs about 4:30 and my phone hasn't stopped ringing. Would you believe there were over 100 people through my open house on Sat.? Phew! We should be in contract by tomorrow evening....AND while all this was going on, I received another offer for 320 Rio Del Mar Blvd. this evening too! What a day!
Business has been incredible... ratcheting up as I take this Brian Buffini class which is reinvigorating me... I had 3 listing appointments this past week and I'm amazed! Only caveat: I would love to take a couple days off very soon and just be pampered... a spa would be ideal... massaged and fed and healthy exercise... I'll have to see what I can schedule and soon.
Life is what we make it and this is it!!! Today and this very moment is all that we really have... make the most of it!
Carpe diem!
Our man has had a tough week and consequently, it's been tough living with him. He's been impossible but he's also been having more pain and headaches...and unfortunately, he ran out of Norontin. CVS was told by Blue Shield that they couldn't renew his prescription until Tues. and T had been out of the meds for a day already (unbeknownst to me). When T emailed Janell @Stanford Fri., it bounced cause she's not back in until Mon. So, yesterday, I took over, paged the on duty hematologist and explained that as the prescription was written, T had exceeded his allotment (altho' the docs had said he could increase as much as needed). Now CVS wasn't getting the message & I'd enlisted Linda's help to pick up T's meds cause I was enroute to an open house in Milpitas & T had been dozing when I left. Linda & then, T ended up wrangling with the pharmacist and getting it filled & covered by insurance. I have to say I was instantly ballistic cause no insurance co. should be able to dictate what meds a patient needs or when!!! Luckily, Linda & T prevailed and I vented and no animals were injured in the process. So, T was not feeling well when he finally got the meds and ended up having a very hard time 'til his body evened out..
Today T seems more like himself. Thank God!!! We were able to meet Deanna & Gary's new grandbaby and hang out in Saratoga with our extended family while I fielded 25 offers for my new Milpitas listing. Funny, I thought we only had 15 and then, after finally checking all my email accounts - there were another 8. We countered 4 and made my wonderful clients very happy! I was able to meet them in our Los Gatos office to review the offers. Background on why I took a Milpitas listing: I sold these referred clients a small home on a 9300 sq' lot in the Cambrian area of San Jose almost 3 years ago. Their intention was to remodel the new home and move in within 6 months. Well, as we all know remodels never complete on time or on budget so, they moved into their new home about a week ago. I put their Milpitas home on the MLS Thurs about 4:30 and my phone hasn't stopped ringing. Would you believe there were over 100 people through my open house on Sat.? Phew! We should be in contract by tomorrow evening....AND while all this was going on, I received another offer for 320 Rio Del Mar Blvd. this evening too! What a day!
Business has been incredible... ratcheting up as I take this Brian Buffini class which is reinvigorating me... I had 3 listing appointments this past week and I'm amazed! Only caveat: I would love to take a couple days off very soon and just be pampered... a spa would be ideal... massaged and fed and healthy exercise... I'll have to see what I can schedule and soon.
Life is what we make it and this is it!!! Today and this very moment is all that we really have... make the most of it!
Carpe diem!
Saturday, April 28, 2012
Today is Saturday, April 28th
Wow! What a week!!!! Best news: Tracy is holding his own. His white cell count is still holding at 2.5. Normal is 4-11. His weight is back to normal at 231 lbs. Yahoo! He handled the chemo yesterday with great humor after shucking and jiving with Bruno and a new Fellow. Bruno teases Tracy relentlessly about his beautiful curls... I think he's jealous.... and of course T smiles and preens and tosses his curls. Bruno says T's hair will go back to his original state after chemo... we'll see. We're still looking at October for the end of this maintenance protocol and I think Bruno is resigned to keeping T on Vincristine once a month and no other additional chemo chemicals. I'm glad. T is tolerating this and oh soooo tired. He just left for his walk on the beach with our Riley, his constant companion.
I'm off to meet with a client/friend to go through all of their new home's disclosures. Tricky, we're gonna conference in her Dad who is at home about 500 miles away. He'll be able to sign digitally as we go through everything. Technology is so amazing! After we're through, I'm off to Relay for Life in Santa Clara. I'm walking for our pal, Roddy Magallanes and of course our boy, T and then... a real treat... a massage for both of us by Jan, of oh so wonderful hands...
Yesterday, we managed to pack in a listing appointment in Cupertino prior to Stanford and then, a listing appointment in Milpitas afterwards. Then, we came home and collapsed. That's a sample of what our lives have been like over the last week. Jammed packed and happy and very busy... it's a good thing.
Our favorite Stanford Concierge, Holly Gautier stopped to visit with us yesterday. She told Tracy about videotaped lectures that he can access online. The lectures are all about the different phases of the cancer cycle. I think T will benefit from hearing about others experiences. It would be good for him to know that the aches and pains will cease at some point after chemo... he is coming back though... he solved a dilemma for me and my iPhone yesterday. I have a new fob that attaches to my phone which with a wonderful new app makes my phone my Realtor lockbox key and much more. Only problem was that my iPhone case didn't allow the fob to attach closely enough to get a signal. Tracy saw the problem and was able to cut the case enough to seal the deal. His brain is back!!! His cunning and clever aptitude has resurfaced and our boy is baaaack!!!
Hallelujah!
I'm off to meet with a client/friend to go through all of their new home's disclosures. Tricky, we're gonna conference in her Dad who is at home about 500 miles away. He'll be able to sign digitally as we go through everything. Technology is so amazing! After we're through, I'm off to Relay for Life in Santa Clara. I'm walking for our pal, Roddy Magallanes and of course our boy, T and then... a real treat... a massage for both of us by Jan, of oh so wonderful hands...
Yesterday, we managed to pack in a listing appointment in Cupertino prior to Stanford and then, a listing appointment in Milpitas afterwards. Then, we came home and collapsed. That's a sample of what our lives have been like over the last week. Jammed packed and happy and very busy... it's a good thing.
Our favorite Stanford Concierge, Holly Gautier stopped to visit with us yesterday. She told Tracy about videotaped lectures that he can access online. The lectures are all about the different phases of the cancer cycle. I think T will benefit from hearing about others experiences. It would be good for him to know that the aches and pains will cease at some point after chemo... he is coming back though... he solved a dilemma for me and my iPhone yesterday. I have a new fob that attaches to my phone which with a wonderful new app makes my phone my Realtor lockbox key and much more. Only problem was that my iPhone case didn't allow the fob to attach closely enough to get a signal. Tracy saw the problem and was able to cut the case enough to seal the deal. His brain is back!!! His cunning and clever aptitude has resurfaced and our boy is baaaack!!!
Hallelujah!
Saturday, April 21, 2012
Today is Saturday, April 21st
OK, so it's been awhile... life got in the way...
I'm a very happy gal today. Tracy & I are enjoying the simple pleasures of living on the coast. It's 88 degrees and we're sitting on our back deck in the wonderful shade having listened to my favorite programs on KAZU (our NPR station) since about 10:00 this morning while I caught up on the last 3 days of the SS Sentinel and the SJ Mercury News. Our listening pleasure started with Click and Clack, the Tappet Bros. whose "Car Talk" show about all the foibles facing car owners leads to a lot of giggles until "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me" makes for outright belly laughs.
Speaking of belly laughs...OMG! last night was a night for raucous outright belly rolling hysterics... Carla, Jayne and Tim (the lovelies) arrived about 8:30PM armed with an Aptos Pizza large ( T inspired vegetarian with sausage substituted for mushrooms) pizza pie and their ready for anything selves and we proceeded to sample Skinny Girls Cosmos in frozen form while we munched on pizza and our special cheese cake. I took it it very slowly having already been a very bad girl earlier in the week.
Interesting... I went from almost zero for several weeks/months (T doesn't drink much at all anymore and I don't like to drink alone) to sharing several bottles of red with my good friend, Deb while watching the finals of the singer/songwriter contest at Brittania Arms Tues. night. Gar had invited us at dinner time with the salmon burger enticing us to join them. That incident cruelly reminded me that having fun has its cost sometimes... also remembered that eating prior to imbibing was VERY important.
Anyway, last night was a total hoot for all especially after we sampled some of T's special sauce. I felt like a little kid again as we ran outside to smell our blooming lilacs. All of us making enough noise to raise our sleepy neighborhood from sleep... and everything was funny as we each laughed with total abandonment at our stories, Tim's impressions and nothing at all... until T announced it was time for bed...1:15 AM came very quickly. I was sad to see everyone leave this morning but so glad that we had all enjoyed ourselves to the max and none of us would have to give up the day because of excess last night! Phew!
Lots of amazing stuff going on over the last week. I started a new refresher real estate class- Peak Producers by Brian Buffini. I've realized that I can tailor the class program to what I want to adopt and that's a very good thing. Lots of reminders about what's important to me and most of all to my clients. BUT with starting this 12 week class and my conversational Italian every other Thurs., I've definitely got a very full dance card. I figure if we can't travel, I won't be bored... I had brought up a brief road trip perhaps to Santa Barbara to my honey and he summarily nixed it with "why go there, when we live here?" as we strolled the shore one morning....
And then there's my honey, Tracy. My love still suffers with headaches and aching feet and body pain with nary a word. I know he's in pain when I hear the Tylenol bottle shaking out a few pills. I'm thankful that he and I share our home and our lives together ignoring the elephant in the room. He had his labs done last week and we waited anxiously hoping that we wouldn't hear anything about low counts... and THANK GOD!!! no news was good news... Next Friday will be telling and we hope uneventful as well.
I've made a commitment to take a few hearty hikes with Marilyn and hopefully, that will lead to shedding a few pounds. I'm ready for Spring and Summer and being outdoors again as we relish being here on the coast...
Carpe diem!!!!
I'm a very happy gal today. Tracy & I are enjoying the simple pleasures of living on the coast. It's 88 degrees and we're sitting on our back deck in the wonderful shade having listened to my favorite programs on KAZU (our NPR station) since about 10:00 this morning while I caught up on the last 3 days of the SS Sentinel and the SJ Mercury News. Our listening pleasure started with Click and Clack, the Tappet Bros. whose "Car Talk" show about all the foibles facing car owners leads to a lot of giggles until "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me" makes for outright belly laughs.
Speaking of belly laughs...OMG! last night was a night for raucous outright belly rolling hysterics... Carla, Jayne and Tim (the lovelies) arrived about 8:30PM armed with an Aptos Pizza large ( T inspired vegetarian with sausage substituted for mushrooms) pizza pie and their ready for anything selves and we proceeded to sample Skinny Girls Cosmos in frozen form while we munched on pizza and our special cheese cake. I took it it very slowly having already been a very bad girl earlier in the week.
Interesting... I went from almost zero for several weeks/months (T doesn't drink much at all anymore and I don't like to drink alone) to sharing several bottles of red with my good friend, Deb while watching the finals of the singer/songwriter contest at Brittania Arms Tues. night. Gar had invited us at dinner time with the salmon burger enticing us to join them. That incident cruelly reminded me that having fun has its cost sometimes... also remembered that eating prior to imbibing was VERY important.
Anyway, last night was a total hoot for all especially after we sampled some of T's special sauce. I felt like a little kid again as we ran outside to smell our blooming lilacs. All of us making enough noise to raise our sleepy neighborhood from sleep... and everything was funny as we each laughed with total abandonment at our stories, Tim's impressions and nothing at all... until T announced it was time for bed...1:15 AM came very quickly. I was sad to see everyone leave this morning but so glad that we had all enjoyed ourselves to the max and none of us would have to give up the day because of excess last night! Phew!
Lots of amazing stuff going on over the last week. I started a new refresher real estate class- Peak Producers by Brian Buffini. I've realized that I can tailor the class program to what I want to adopt and that's a very good thing. Lots of reminders about what's important to me and most of all to my clients. BUT with starting this 12 week class and my conversational Italian every other Thurs., I've definitely got a very full dance card. I figure if we can't travel, I won't be bored... I had brought up a brief road trip perhaps to Santa Barbara to my honey and he summarily nixed it with "why go there, when we live here?" as we strolled the shore one morning....
And then there's my honey, Tracy. My love still suffers with headaches and aching feet and body pain with nary a word. I know he's in pain when I hear the Tylenol bottle shaking out a few pills. I'm thankful that he and I share our home and our lives together ignoring the elephant in the room. He had his labs done last week and we waited anxiously hoping that we wouldn't hear anything about low counts... and THANK GOD!!! no news was good news... Next Friday will be telling and we hope uneventful as well.
I've made a commitment to take a few hearty hikes with Marilyn and hopefully, that will lead to shedding a few pounds. I'm ready for Spring and Summer and being outdoors again as we relish being here on the coast...
Carpe diem!!!!
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Today is Tuesday, April 10th
A few days reprieve from the Tax Man... taxes are due on the 17th this year... and the wheel goes round and round.
I'm in a reflective mood... we walked the beach in the rain this morning and Riley ran until I thought he'd drop and then, he ran some more.... I just decided to take the day off. I'm in need of a day to do nothing.... we have a movie and the couch has beckoned me... oh and a good book "Satori" too.... think I'll turn on the fireplace and cuddle with my Riley if he dares...
Tracy has been achy, crampy and a little off for a couple days now. He's gonna take the day too. He managed to drag a rusted out smoker out to the street at my Rio Del Mar listing and put a free sign on it yesterday along with putting it on freecycle.org. Hopefully, someone will want it and soon. Reduced the listing price of the home to $594,000 and that should entice interest...
Allora... I attended a conversational Italian group last Thurs at Lila's. I loved it! Ordered a couple verb workbooks from Amazon last night that should help... I would love to be able to converse in Italian aside from using the present tense solamente.... I probably sounded like a child in the past cause I couldn't use all the appropriate tenses and verbs but it sure is fun to do it this way... all conversations are in Italian with the leader/ teacher correcting and prodding as we go... a total flight from the usual and a chance to exercise my brain in a different way... and a total throwback to my childhood memory of Mom & Dad speaking in their secret language...
Easter day was a wonderful gathering of dear friends and an opportunity to see Lea, our God child. She's gorgeous and vibrant- so alive!!! Grad school- Vet school is keeping her hopping. It was a quick trip over the hill to Carla's for a beautiful dinner and lots of catching up... that's what holidays are all about... we missed Gary & Deanna's celebration and the Pevarnick holiday gatherings and Jan & Tom's picnic on the beach... we were everywhere in spirit and avoiding small children (think petri dishes) and hoping for Tracy's health to hold and thank God it did...
Carpe diem my friends!
I'm in a reflective mood... we walked the beach in the rain this morning and Riley ran until I thought he'd drop and then, he ran some more.... I just decided to take the day off. I'm in need of a day to do nothing.... we have a movie and the couch has beckoned me... oh and a good book "Satori" too.... think I'll turn on the fireplace and cuddle with my Riley if he dares...
Tracy has been achy, crampy and a little off for a couple days now. He's gonna take the day too. He managed to drag a rusted out smoker out to the street at my Rio Del Mar listing and put a free sign on it yesterday along with putting it on freecycle.org. Hopefully, someone will want it and soon. Reduced the listing price of the home to $594,000 and that should entice interest...
Allora... I attended a conversational Italian group last Thurs at Lila's. I loved it! Ordered a couple verb workbooks from Amazon last night that should help... I would love to be able to converse in Italian aside from using the present tense solamente.... I probably sounded like a child in the past cause I couldn't use all the appropriate tenses and verbs but it sure is fun to do it this way... all conversations are in Italian with the leader/ teacher correcting and prodding as we go... a total flight from the usual and a chance to exercise my brain in a different way... and a total throwback to my childhood memory of Mom & Dad speaking in their secret language...
Easter day was a wonderful gathering of dear friends and an opportunity to see Lea, our God child. She's gorgeous and vibrant- so alive!!! Grad school- Vet school is keeping her hopping. It was a quick trip over the hill to Carla's for a beautiful dinner and lots of catching up... that's what holidays are all about... we missed Gary & Deanna's celebration and the Pevarnick holiday gatherings and Jan & Tom's picnic on the beach... we were everywhere in spirit and avoiding small children (think petri dishes) and hoping for Tracy's health to hold and thank God it did...
Carpe diem my friends!
Sunday, April 8, 2012
Easter Sunday
What a beautiful crisp morning! There are many of us who have lost their faith in organized religion... me being one of them... but on this holy day, I realize that I believe in the power of us. I have faith in us. I love and I find love in people. I believe that we are put here on earth to spread love and to find our purpose to share love in whatever we do. I truly believe in "do unto others as you would have them do unto me". I guess I could call myself a Christian. I could get off on a rant right now about the Christian coalition co-opting Christian for all the wrong reasons but I won't ....suffice to say... I believe in the God in all of us and that God is love...
On this holiest of days... share love with all that you encounter ... I hope you all are with your loved ones wherever that may be...
Happy Easter and Happy Passover!!!!
On this holiest of days... share love with all that you encounter ... I hope you all are with your loved ones wherever that may be...
Happy Easter and Happy Passover!!!!
Sunday, April 1, 2012
Today is Sunday, April 1st April Fool's Day
Wow! What a weekend! As we left for our walk on the beach Sat. morning, I casually asked T if he thought it was going to rain... ai yi yi the next thing we knew the wind started whipping us and the rain was pelting us as the storm came crashing down. Riley didn't care as he roamed the deserted shore and we fought the wind and rain... home to shed our drenched clothes & relish a long hot shower after bathing our contented boy, Riley. Then it was time to attack our taxes and finally, a brief respite with Lila & Pat. Home to rustle up some dinner and watch "A Week with Marilyn". Now that was a 4 star movie. Michelle Williams embodied Marilyn! she was fabulous and I loved the movie!
Today between finishing up the tax compilation for our meeting with our tax gal in the morning and clearing out the route for our new (to us) sofas for Tracy's lair; I showed homes to Carol and Chuck. They are set on one and away we go!!! We'll write an offer by Wed. and keep our fingers crossed...
T had a very big day. He borrowed Tom's truck, & he & Riley drove over to Saratoga and picked up the couches and made arrangements with Sean & a friend to unload the couches on this end. My man is tired but oh so happy...
The couch story is a great one. Deanna wanted a sleeper couch for family to visit (since they don't have a guest room). The couches that Gary really didn't want to replace were to be donated but we came along and were able to lovingly recycle them. They're wonderful! We are able to recline on each end and still have Riley snuggled between us. We settled into them this evening and watched "Moneyball" A good movie but definitely NOT best movie of the year.. and the couch was very comfortable...thank you one and all!!!
Now we get to recycle our settee plus leather recliners....and the wheel goes round and round.
Today between finishing up the tax compilation for our meeting with our tax gal in the morning and clearing out the route for our new (to us) sofas for Tracy's lair; I showed homes to Carol and Chuck. They are set on one and away we go!!! We'll write an offer by Wed. and keep our fingers crossed...
T had a very big day. He borrowed Tom's truck, & he & Riley drove over to Saratoga and picked up the couches and made arrangements with Sean & a friend to unload the couches on this end. My man is tired but oh so happy...
The couch story is a great one. Deanna wanted a sleeper couch for family to visit (since they don't have a guest room). The couches that Gary really didn't want to replace were to be donated but we came along and were able to lovingly recycle them. They're wonderful! We are able to recline on each end and still have Riley snuggled between us. We settled into them this evening and watched "Moneyball" A good movie but definitely NOT best movie of the year.. and the couch was very comfortable...thank you one and all!!!
Now we get to recycle our settee plus leather recliners....and the wheel goes round and round.
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